Intensives are based on the regular fee that your therapist charges and payment is due at the time of scheduling. We do not provide refunds for cancellations. We can reschedule your intensive with a 30 day notice. We encourage you to spend time considering whether or not the intensive format is appropriate for you and your relationship before scheduling and making your payment.

Couples therapy intensives can run one to four days, with four hours of couples therapy happening each day. For those coming to San Diego from out of town, we provide a recommended schedule for how to spend your days when you are not in therapy.

Currently our intensives are held at our office in Encinitas, Calfornia.

No. Couples therapy intensives are not covered by health insurance. You will not be receiving a mental health diagnosis nor will the focus of therapy be centered on treatment of a mental health diagnosis. Couples therapy intensives are focused on healing and strengthening your relationship.

No. We do not provide a mental health diagnosis and therefore are not able to offer you a superbill.

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy is a therapeutic model that was developed by Dr. Sue Johnson. It offers a structured, experiential, and humanistic approach to relationship change based on attachment theory. The process has three stages and nine steps. In stage one we get to know the couple. We learn about their unique strengths, challenges, patterns, and where they get stuck. Our focus is on helping the couple to work together as a team to communicate better and connect more. In stage two we begin to explicitly shift how the couple interacts through supporting each person to share authentically, support each other, and clearly express needs and wants. In stage three we focus on developing new solutions to old problems, deepen bonding, and support each individual and partner to take steps towards hopes and dreams. In every session, couples have the opportunity to bring forward specific challenges they are struggling with, such as conflict, sex, infidelity, parenting, or finances. 

Our therapists specialize in couples therapy and relationships. They have Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy and are Licensed or Registered Marriage and Family Therapists. In addition, they engage in ongoing training and consultation in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy. All of our therapists have completed the Externship in Emotionally Focused Therapy. Many of our therapists have completed Core Skills Training in Emotionally Focused Therapy and are working toward EFT Certification. To learn more about EFT, the gold standard in couples therapy, visit www.iceeft.com. Your therapist will facilitate a process that creates change from the inside out. You and your therapist will work together to actively shape the relationship you desire. 

We have discovered that most couples communicate well during the times they are feeling close and connected. Yet when couples experience conflict, their communication skills tend to go out the window. Communication is complex. The messages we send to others are influenced by emotions, verbal language, body language, thoughts, memories, facial expressions, past experiences, and tone of voice. Food, sleep, substances, and our general state of wellbeing also impact how we communicate. Therapy helps couples raise awareness, and shift, the underlying dynamics that drive their communication patterns. 

Absolutely. Couples therapy includes sex therapy. For most people sex is a vital aspect of their romantic relationship. The process of couples therapy begins with helping couples co-create a solid foundation and new ways of interacting with each other. Once this is solidly established we help our clients explore and enhance their sexual connection.

Yes, we can help. You are in the right place and we are here for you. We provide counseling that is directive while being non-blaming and non-shaming. Affairs can be deeply painful for both partners and many can experience symptoms associated with post-traumatic stress. Yet most couples discover that with therapy they are able to heal, recover, and stay together if this is their goal. We are trained in the attachment injury repair model and successfully help couples work through their pain and restore their relationship to a fulfilled state. 

We help our couples meet their goals for therapy, whatever their goals may be. At the beginning of our work together we will help each partner articulate what it is they want to get out of the therapy process. The therapists at Integrative Family Therapy are pro-relationship and align themselves with the goals that their clients bring to therapy.

This is a common dilemma that is best discussed in therapy. We cannot give direct advice on whether someone stays in their relationship or leaves the relationship. Generally speaking, through the work of therapy most people can create healthy and fulfilling relationships. Many couples find peace of mind in knowing that they are trying everything they can to improve their relationship before making this decision. If you are seriously considering leaving your marriage, we encourage you to share this with your therapist and your partner so you can begin facing this challenge directly. Some couples decide that the best thing for them is to end their relationship. If this is the decision you and your partner make, your therapist will support you to move through this process amicably and in a manner that is dignified and caring for all involved.

Some couples begin therapy at a time when one or both are seriously considering divorce. Or, they may not want to divorce but they are not interested in working on their relationship at this particular time. During the assessment process we will explore your commitment levels to the relationship and to therapy itself.  Therapy tends to help couples tap into energy and hope. The assessment process with your therapist will help you develop more clarity. 

Couples therapy intensives are best suited for couples that have some ability to navigate conflict without escalation. It may be more appropriate to attend individual or weekly therapy for several weeks prior to an intensive to aquire emotional regulation skills. When we begin with a new couple we learn more about the nature of their arguments and inquire about the levels of emotional and physical safety that are present within the relationship. We can begin therapy with almost all couples that are experiencing explosive arguments. Sometimes we determine that it is best for each partner to do their own individual therapy before starting couples therapy. It is not safe for us to begin couples therapy if emotional, physical, financial or sexual abuse is present. If you are experiencing abuse in your relationship, please tell your therapist about this during an individual session so they can help you get the support you need. 

If you are being abused, whether this is physically, emotionally, mentally, financially or sexually, couples therapy is not safe. We encourage you to schedule individual therapy instead of couples therapy to discuss your concerns.  If you are already in couples therapy, contact our care coordinator and ask to schedule an individual therapy session with a therapist that is not your couples therapist. The individual therapist can help support you with next steps that will prioritize your safety. If you do not feel safe enough to bring this information forward to one of our therapists please contact another therapist outside our practice. To educate yourself on abuse in relationships at The Hotline website https://www.thehotline.org/.  Or visit the Community Resource Center https://crcncc.org/get-help/domestic-violence-services/ .

Yes. We work with couples practicing consensual non-monogamy, polyamory, swinging, and open marriages. Therapy can help you engage in meaningful dialogue, support each other during challenges, and keep connection strong while navigating the complexities of multiple relationships. 

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) is an evidence based practice. Ninety percent of couples that move through the EFT process find that their relationship improves and seventy percent of couples move from a distressed state to a satisfied state. To learn more about EFT research visit www.iceeft.com