CRISTINA TRETTE RELATIONSHIP THERAPY
  • Home
  • About
  • Counseling
    • Couples Therapy
    • Family Therapy
    • Individual Therapy
  • Blog
    • Couples and relationships
    • Parenting and Family
    • Wellness and Wellbeing
  • Work With Me
  • Integrative Family Therapy

Visualizing your way into effective parenting

3/8/2016

0 Comments

 
By: Cristina Trette
Visualization is a well researched therapeutic technique that has been shown to increase performance and lower stress response. This can entail visualizing oneself in a challenging or stressful situation as a way to practice. During the visualization the individual sees himself moving through the challenging or stressful situation successfully and having a positive outcome.

If one takes the time to do mental rehearsal, lets say every night over the course of a few weeks, she will train the brain to respond to stressful stimuli more effectively. Mental rehearsal can be used to prepare one self for a variety of situations include public speaking, job interviews, athletic pursuits (my son uses visualization to prepare himself for challenging and difficult skateboarding moves). Really, the list goes on and on.


What does this have to do with parenting? 

Well, parenting can be stressful. Tantrums, homework battles, defiance, and power struggles can lead to challenging moments between adult and child. Some moments are so challenging that a true stress response can take place within the body. Signs that an individual is under stress include rapid and shallow breathing, tension and tightness in the body, difficulty swallowing, and increased thirst. Have you ever noticed these sensations in your body when your child has a tantrum or when you are rushing to get out the door in the morning and your child becomes defiant? 

Wouldn't it be nice if you could train yourself to respond to the stressful stimuli differently so that no matter what your child does you remain  emotionally regulated allowing you to engage in effective parenting?! To get specific tips on how to practice mental rehearsal so that you can become a more responsive parent read on. 

1. Select one specific challenge that you are currently encountering with your child. If you can, choose a challenge that happens frequently. 

2. Next, spend a little bit of time thinking about how you react to the challenge? Do you experience stress and overwhelm? Do you yell, threaten, or punish? Or do you become permissive? 

3. Now, visualize the best version of yourself engaging with your child in this specific challenging situation. What does your best mothering look like, even your kid is being difficult? See every detail. Relish in the how good it feels to parent in such a positive and responsive manner. Make sure to take long, deep breaths while visualizing. 

4. Repeat step 3 over and over as much as you are able to. A great time for visualization is when you lay in bed at night after your child have gone to sleep. You only need to practice for a few minutes at a time. 

5. When the real life challenge presents itself, notice how much more responsive you are. This practice works because the brain has responded to the visualization as if it happened in real life. New neural pathways were formed in the brain creating new patterns in behavior. So by the time the real life situation presents itself, you will be seasoned at sailing through the challenge with grace and ease. 

I would love to hear how this practice works for you. If you try it out, let me know your experience in the comments box below! ​
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Follow me at:


    Picture

    Parents and Family


    Want to stop flipping out on your kids? Try this...
    Seven ways to stop overwhelmed parenting 
    It starts with you
    Nine ways to be a more positive parent
    Visualize your way to more effective parenting
    Why your kid may be acting out
    Change your thoughts, change your parenting
    Two things I wish I had done when I became a mother
    Eight steps to yell less
    Five ways to be a happier parent now
    How to take an adult time out with grace
    Practicing mindfulness as a couple after baby is born

    Couples and Relationships


    Learning to trust your partner
    ​Turning towards your partner
    How to get her in bed (after marriage and kids)
    The pledge that turned things around
    Is infidelity a deal breaker? 

    Personal Well-Being


    Connecting to what makes you feel alive
    Can we have it all?

Make An Appointment

You are welcome to schedule a free twenty minute consultation appointment by texting Cristina Trette at 858-337-6124 or emailing her at cristina@cristinatrette.com. Or, click the button below to request an appointment now. For consultations, please note that only one person will schedule and attend the meeting.
Request Appointment

Picture
Picture
Cristina Trette, MA, LMFT 117148 is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with the Board of Behavioral Sciences in the State of California. Content on this website is for information and educational purposes only and is not to be considered Marriage and Family Therapy.
​
  • Home
  • About
  • Counseling
    • Couples Therapy
    • Family Therapy
    • Individual Therapy
  • Blog
    • Couples and relationships
    • Parenting and Family
    • Wellness and Wellbeing
  • Work With Me
  • Integrative Family Therapy